4am December 17, 2008

Good morning friends and family! It is so amazing to me how our bodies adjust in times like these. I am weary yet awake and feeling fine. Usually a night without much sleep creates a meanie in me! Now without sleep for several nights I am okay...well, so I think..might want to ask Todd or Mom.

I have been passing clots much like the last pregnancy with Saige which ended in a D&C. So prayers for me are also requested. I just want to get home and be with my family, no more pass interference.

I woke up at 4am feeling refreshed after 5 hrs of uninterrupted sleep! Amazing I know...and I am still at the hospital. I will be here all day for they are kicking me out at midnight. It will be a sad departure.

Well, Linden is being sedated while they have increased her pressure again to 32. He blood gases have not been stellar so they are going to decide whether to give her more surfactant in the near future. She is having another chest xray as I write...they kicked me out. I wonder if the technicians glow at night...I don't think I have seen an iron drape for them to wear? Anyway, the tears continue to flow as I sit and pray over Linden. I know what the outcome is...I have beautiful Saige, yet, it does not seem to ease me.

Her CO2 levels are poor (high)...so our prayer is that she begins to expell the CO2 and continue reducing the need for oxygen.

I do have to say, seeing her relaxed and sedated was a comfort...to know she is not fighting the tube and resting well...helps me to rest better...not well.

The nurses are spectacular and most are the same as last year with Saige...that too is comforting. We have taken pictures, but, I feel it is not something most people want to see...or maybe I just don't want to be reminded. As she improves and tubes begin to vanish...I will post more photos.